I’ve been here before….and I must admit I don’t like the feeling…..one bag said “Tiny Twists”.. and the other “Tiny Twists….low fat”…in big bold print.

The Mrs specifically said not to get the low fat ones.. and the shopping list didn’t say “Tiny” anything…. just “those small pretzel twists”… I shoulda known this was going to be tough…Even the grated Parmesan would prove a challenge and any dope can pick out grated Parmesan…well, almost any dope.

It was Saturday, and the wife was making a couple of dishes for an annual Super Bowl get together at a friends house…I’d use the term “party”…. but a room full of old guys sitting on a couple of couches eating doesn’t really qualify as a party….Not that I didn’t try to raise the spirits myself by returning to the wine bar multiple times…yet, my attempts at humor were returned with those stern old guy looks like..”that ain’t’ funny”..or “I heard that before”… and when I giggled at a commercial with Howard Stern, one guest was heard to say..”anything with that as____le in it has got to be bad…. that pretty well shut me up and I decided to join the old guys and just eat, watch the game and grunt every once in awhile…

Well, I digress… I got home and pridefully placed the bags on the counter…like a lion who just brought home a freshly killed Wart Hog for dinner for the family…..I smiled as I pulled the “Tiny Twists” from the bag but immediately realized the Mrs. didn’t want “Tiny Twists”…she wanted those “small ones”… and these were too big… But I protested..”honey…their TINY..it says so right on the bag…and of course to add insult to injury…she pointed out a very small little graphic on the bag in the lower right hand corner…it said “no fat”…. so I bought the no fat ones over the low fat ones…. a triple sin…..then the Parmesan…. “the grated bits are too big..”  She pulled a container from the fridge with the remnants of the old Parmesan and showed me…

Are you married?… Are you a guy?……well, for just a glimpse into my earlier days..this is where I would’ve went into a small tirade and left the shopping to the Mrs….

But I finally graduated “Cum La De Dah” from the school of marriage…that means I have learned that unless I want unfriendly silence for the next few days..and immeasurable ill will that will require my maximum effort to earn forgiveness….I will NOT have a tirade and leave it to the Mrs… so, with a sense of inner pride that only comes from years of training, I smiled and said I’ll go back to the store and try to get it right this time “honey”…

Success with the Parmesan..they actually had some with smaller pieces…but no luck on the Pretzels…. now this is where I start thinking unfair thoughts….I just knew when I returned after visits to Target, Byerly’s and Cub, the Mrs would roll her eyes, get in the very warm Jeep and be back in three minutes with what she needed….and to make matters worse, she’d probably pick the pretzels up at a gas station someplace because only a moron could miss them…..but I was wrong….

She smiled a grateful smile and said thank you for trying….I love my Mrs…and the training actually works….. you just gotta stow that pride away someplace……

Super Bowl was a great game and the food even better…..